Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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