i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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