I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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