I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
