It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
