I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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