sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize