Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
