I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
