people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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