We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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