Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
