Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
