Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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