A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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