Me too!
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
