Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize