Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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