So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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