she woke up with a sticky ear
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
