it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize