the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
