My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize