problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Randomize
