why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
