Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
