I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
