did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
