just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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