She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Randomize
