Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
