Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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