I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
