ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
