We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
