I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
operation have a gay friend backfired
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
