I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
