i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Barsexuality is the new black.
I wish i was in the wii world.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
