another moral hangover. fuck.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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