As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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