Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
