Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
