She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
