remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
