you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
