absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
