Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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