But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
