I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
