K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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