nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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