If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
